Memory gone, but brilliance remains :)

As I probably mentioned in an earlier blog, I purchased a "keyfinder" from Brookstone, which has been a godsend.  A remote control is locked up in Mom's medicine cabinet, accessible by key for the staff.  Her keys have a "fob" that rings when the remote button is pushed.  My visits often start with the pushing of the "keyfinder" button.
  I walked into her bedroom and pushed the button.  I heard a ring behind me, near her front hall.  I moved to the hall and pressed the button again.  The ringing went off outside of her apartment.  Hidden under the feather boa draped across Minerva, her marble statue, was the key FOB. She took it apart so that no one else could find her keys!  After a search, I found her keys inside the pants she wore the nite before....  We both got a good laugh out of that one.....

Fall #2

My phone rang just as I was readying to turn it off in the movie theater.  It was the Nursing Director, and she was notifying me that Mom had just fallen. "She seems fine.  Vital signs are stable, and she is walking OK. She says that she hit her head, so we are putting ice on it."  She reassured me that Mom was OK, and Mom also said that she was all right, just "a little shook up."  I gave the Director Tom's cell phone, notified Tom, and stayed for the movie with my 7 year old neighbor.  Tom went to see Mom after work and stayed for dinner; we came over after the movie.
   Head injuries are tough.  One of the signs you look for is confusion; that is also a hallmark of Alzheimer's.  She was definitely more confused when we saw her; but it was also nighttime, a time that we don't usually see her.  I took the staff's word that she was "her usual nighttime self" and headed home-- I would come back this morning and reassess.
  Mom was sitting at breakfast when I arrived, her usual happy self.  She has a rather lovely purple bruise on her left temple, but is otherwise fine.  Her gait has returned to normal, and she is still her happy self, thank Goodness!

Changing Roles

I went to visit Nana today, and I now realize that we have officially changed roles.  The Nursing Director pulled me aside, with a big grin on her face.
  "I was downstairs around dinnertime last nite, and I looked over to see your Mom, and she wasn't wearing any pants. I then realized that she was in her bathing suit, so I sent one of the CNAs down to get her.  She told her that she was in her swimsuit because she didn't want to miss swim class, 'because my daughter bawled me out for skipping class yesterday.' " Yes, she is now using one of my favorite teenage expressions...
   Looking on the bright side, she did remember our discussion about how important exercising was to keep her Alzheimers at bay.....

Some Favorite Phone Conversations... :)

And now for a little levity: some of my favorite NanaPap messages:

1.  Ring. "HI Mom"
              "Hi Nancy, it's your Mom.  Quick question: I know that I have leukemia, but what's that other thing?"
               "Alzheimers"
               "Oh, that's right-- Alzheimers-- I keep forgetting!"

2. Ring. "Hi Mom"
              "Hi Nancy, it's your Mom.  Could you help me out? I'm lost.  I don't know where I am."
              "You are in your apartment."
              "I am?  How can you be sure?"
              "Because you are calling me from your house phone."
    Silence for a moment.  Giggle.  "You're right! Thanks hon." click.

3.  Voicemail message:
        "Hi Nancy.  This is Jane Papineau.  I just wanted to let you know that I am getting a bit confused, so I have decided that I am moving in with my daughter Nancy.  I think you have her number, but if you don't, you can call here and they can give it to you.  She lives just a few miles down the road, so you should be able to find me."  (Husband Tom, listening to this message... "Oh no she's not!" :))

heeheeheehee

Memories vs Moments

A second visit to Nana this week, and a second call, one hour after I left.  "Did you stop by today? I can't remember."
  Now, this does make me wonder, should I even stop by?  She doesn't even remember! And, the answer is YES.  She still has so much to teach me.
  When I walk in the door, Nana's face lights up.  We go for a walk, or share a meal, or clean up some problem that has been bothering her. 
  This week, we wrote a letter to a young high school student.  Nana is part of a Senior-to-Student pen pal program with the Special Needs program at SHS, and we wrote her introductory letter. I asked questions, and she described her childhood.  Most, I had heard before, some of the info was new.... and whether the new info is true or false is up for debate with my siblings.. haha! But her closing line was very cool:
       "In life, you often need to choose whether to laugh or cry.  I choose laughter."

So, right now, I realize that I am not giving Mom happy new memories.  I am giving her happy moments.  But she is still giving me, and so many other people, great memories; and great life lessons.  Now, go find something to laugh about! :)

A Day of Phone Calls

9am: RING.  Uhoh-- Nana calling during Mass time, she is not having a good morning.
  "Hi Mom-- How are you?"
  " I'm feeling a little punk."
(We review symptoms, and agree a little tea and toast will make things better.)
9:10am: RING. 
   "Hi Mom"
   "Hi Nance-- I'm feeling a little punk"
   "Have you called for tea and toast?"
   "Oh, yeah, they are bringing it in right now"
   "OK, eat up and I will see you at 11:30"
    "All right, I will see you then."

I arrive at 11:30, and she is dressed and feeling better.  We head downstairs to the "Bistro", where we have lunch with two of her friends.  We talk about the snowy weather, and the ladies reminisce about the big storms they faced when they were younger.  I mention one of our childhood neighbors, and Nana shares stories about the great times we had, needing no help in straightening out the facts (yay!)  I left at 1pm, feeling pretty good about how she was doing.

Thirty minutes later, the phone rang.
"Nancy, did I call you this morning?"
 "Yup, and then we had lunch. Remember?"
 "We DID? I don't remember that!"  I reviewed what we ate, and who we spoke to, and she said she remembered.... but I am not sure that's true... But when we hung up, she sounded more upbeat. I left my phone at home and ran a few errands. 

Returning to the house, I check my phone.  Four missed calls.  The phone rings again.  The next call is the most painful.

"Hi Nance-- Could you make me a doctor's appointment?  My Alzheimers is getting worse today, so I think I need some new medicine to fix it."
  "Mom, you are on all the medicines. They haven't come up with a medicine that fixes this yet."
  "So, I'm just going to get worse, until I just fade away?"
  "The scientists are working hard for a cure; but right now, they don't have an answer. I'm sorry."
   "Oh....." Silence. "Well, Fish."

I agree, Mom. FISH.